4:30 am

there is this cozy space

that sometimes i can just fit into

when you snuggle up so close + hard

that all i can do is hang on

or risk falling off the edge

of the bed you + i share

tonight wasn't like that

which is not to say that this is a bad thing

and so i landed on the couch

and watched the planets in your living room

in their revolutions and rotations connected

almost line up before my very eyes

in a quasi stellar event

that i interpreted as a sign

until just before that line emerged

they turned and slowly drifted back into chaos

whose language i cannot read

having teased me with the thought

that this should be simple

i had my shoes on, my coat zipped

and was ready to make an exit i hoped

would convey something clean

not so much that the space between us

sleeping tonight was disconcerting

but maybe that i hear you

needing to understand yourself before this

in front of this

and wanting to offer you my faith

in whatever it's going to take

a presence that says this is okay now

knowing that a planet only appears

to clumsily stop and move retrograde

on a course that will outlive

our vantage point at any given point in time

a faith that when we hang on

we never stop moving forward

in what will inevitably become a long course

that tells the story of this love